Hmm...

I don't have a whole lot to share and yet I feel like I haven't blogged in forever. I'm not sure if there is nothing going on or if my thoughts are moving to fast to slow them down to type. Today, Tricia and I decided not to go into the classroom. We are finished except with the decisions of where to place the plants. I think they are a little to big and we might be returning them tomorrow, but anywayz...

Today was a good day to sit and pray, think, research and think some more. I'm struggling to answer so many questions right now. Where the church is and what God is doing has me completely... I don't even know. I'm at a loss for words. I know that I don't have to have all of the answers today, but I would like to. The biggest questions I have right now are
1. How do I love the church body and not support the decision of the church at the same time?
I know that this feels like an easy one to answer, but my mind hasn't grabbed a hold of it yet. I want to support those at the church and continue to keep the family aspect that we have been creating and growing into for so long... however, I feel like continuing to attend the church is showing support of all of it's decisions and "guidelines" and that just rubs me the wrong way. I can't place my finger on it, but something hasn't settled in me since this all started.

and 2. I know what the decision would be if I had a "neo-Pentecostal manifestaion"... but I don't, at least not at this point in my life. So... do I continue with the decision that would be held if I had one (concluding that my belief in these manifestations, and willingly allowing God to use them in my life, are considered equal with having one) or do I disregard all of those thoughts as these are not matters that will keep people from becoming children of God, and therefore, allow myself to stay with an organization that puts God in a box when it comes to this topic.

Then, along with those questions and a few more that follow... I've been curious about the spiritual gifts. I started really studying them today and have found some interesting thins. There are two different types of gifts (from what I have studied thus far) in terms of how God gives them. When looking into the Greek root words for the words gift, there are, naturally, several different ones. The two that I found relevent to the passages that I studied this morning are quite different. When referencing Eph. 4 and the gifts that are listed there, the word gift comes from the Greek root meaning gratuity or offering. This form is for the reference of gift in verse 8. In verse 7, the Greek root has a general application of - to give. What caught my attention is that the form of offering was used in the same sentence as the list of gifts.

Keeping that in mind, switch to 1 Corinthians 12, Romans 12, and 1 Peter 4. When the word gift is used in these sentences, it goes to the Greek root of Charisma. That then translates, in Greek, as - to grant as a favor, qualification, endowment.

I haven't yet put all of the pieces together, but I find it interesting that some gifts are given as offerings (meaning something is given up in order to have them) and that some gifts are given as a favor. All are from God and He decides who gets which one...

I don't know. It's after midnight and I think I just rambled on. I'm not sure if this post makes any sense, but I'm not going to erase it. I haven't come to any conclusions, and I am still, obviously, in the middle of two mind stretching decisions. I'm not even sure how they connect at this point other than they both revolve around spiritual gifts.

So yeah... that's what's goin on in my head. Scary huh? ( and I wasn't sure what to blog about :) )

Things to smile about today:
:) assurance of God's timing
:) kintted booties and hats