Thank you, Father.

5 days

lots of energy

more volunteers than I can count

giving more love than I could have dreamt

helping a community come together

for one family



600 served

$10,000 raised

all praise and glory, forever



Thank you, Father.

I don't even know where to begin...

... I swore more times today than I have my entire life. Granted that's not saying much, but there are three distinct times that I could point out. It isn't my nature to get that upset, but Satan hit it on the mark today. He tried to discourage me and get me off track... he failed. The trials he threw my way today have only increased my faith and my expectations of what God is going to do. What breaks my heart is that church people were used in the process. I learned a lot today. I stood up to leaders that had misconceptions and laid out my thoughts. I was honest and real. It is actually hard for me to think that I said some of the things that I did. But I have been assurred that those things were okay to say. So I'm trusting. I let key people know that I was not going to except the discouragment and that a hurdle was not going to keep me from fulfilling what God wanted done. I also made it very clear that a decision I had made came from God and that I was choosing to listen to Him and not everyone else who thought a different answer would be more appropriate.

What is aggrivating (spelling?) is that the negative was assumed by leadership before questions were asked. That doubt was feed through people that caused negative feedback. That when I gave answers to questions, a sense of shock came about... (that I could actually pull something like that off). Needless to say, I feel very much attacked. I don't know if I should be taking it personally, but when you are told that someone would feel better knowing two other people were in charge... how can you not take that personally. Yes it is a big step. Yes there is a lot to be done. Yes there are a few details not yet completed... but YES I have a God big enough to do the job and sending people faster than I can count to help. Everyone has a talent... some poeple share. Sometimes the answer for before isn't the answer for now.

Okay... I'm done. I really do feel wounded though.

God help me love those that have set up a hurdle and are involved with this process. Help me communicate effectively and tie loose ends. Help me remember that it doesn't matter that I didn't cut them, but that I need to do my part. I know You are going to do something greater than anyone expects. That's why the devil is trying his hardest to upset Your plans. I refuse to let him. I refuse to listen to him. Lord go before me. I know that You are, but I ask specifically that what came about today, would be finished today. I ask specifically that hurdles will not pop up regarding this dinner. I know that perserverence builds character and strength. And I know that You won't give me more than I can handle... personally, I think the semi truck that hit me today is enough for this event. Of course I want Your will. I want You to get complete glory.

I need Your words... I have none left. I need Your love... mine has been drained. I need Your energy... mine has been depleted. I need Your wisdom... mine has been to less. I need Your guidance... shadows have been casted. I need Your voice... others has been to strong.
I need You. I need You. I need You.

This must have been a week meant for new things...

Not only have I started coaching, but last night I got to learn how to dance... to Irish folk music. I was so much fun! It wasn't that riverdance stuff... It was more like square dancing. Only to Irish music. My roomie played the accordian for the band. (That's the connection. I didn't just go seek this out on my own,) Nonetheless, I am excited to have learned a new hobbie and I look forward to the next class. I'm not sure when it is... guess I should look into that one.

Afterward, a couple of new friends came over. These two have been teaching at the Montessori on fridays (recorder club). They are currently music majors at the University. It was great to be in that kind of atmosphere again... you know, all that music language being thrown around. I almost started missing it. I enjoy what God has given me now... I'm not so sure I could go back to a lifestyle of constant practice. Anywayz, that's not the point of starting this paragraph. I wanted to tell you about Lauren. (She was one of them that came over.) She is 21 and a fairly new christian. She hasn't been to church in a while, so I kindly and politely told her that she was coming to church on Sunday. :) It really wasn't as bold and blunt as it sounded. She had made a comment that she would like to come to the Naz... that's when I followed it with this sunday would be a great time to start. So... now on Sunday nights, we will be having a bible study at our house. She was hesitant about bible study, expressing that she didn't know what to do. By that time in the conversation, we had been talking a long time about God and the Bible and where we each were in our lives and what had happened in the past... so it was really exciting for me to inform her that what we were doing, was bible study. She seemed a little surprised. I don't think she thought it could have been that informal. We were talking about God, about our lives, about where God fit into our lives, and what the Bible had to say about it. How much more Bible study could you get?!? We didn't pick apart verses and debate about this translation versus that translation, but we grew, God was there, and a tiny spark was put back into Lauren that had been blown out a while ago.

I'm excited... as if you couldn't tell. I think God is going to do awesome things with this group. I am curious as to who else will be joining, or if God is going to keep it the group it is now. A lot of healing will be taking place. As we talked last night, I learned that Lauren has a lot of emotional healing. A lot of the same emotional healing that I had to go through at that age. (I just made myself sound really old... lol. Isn't it amazing where and how God can take you in just three years.) I also learned that God will be teaching me a lot as He guides me through this friendship.

This is an answer to prayer. For the last couple of months I have been praying that God would bring a bible study that didn't pre-read any material, didn't go off of any pre-written questions (not that those things are bad), but that the bible study would be a time to come and share where you are in life, what you have been reading and how that all fits together. I was sitting on my couch last night talking to Lauren and God said to me... "This is it. I know you didn't want to lead it, but this is it. If you want it, take it." So I did. I didn't want to lead it. I didn't want to have to worry about opening my home once a week. But here I am, following God.

Lord bless my home as people enter and leave. Holy Spirit fill it with your presence. Allow us to be open and real as we were last night. Allow healing to take place when You want it to take place. Let us not push each other into a faster recovery than is needed... and let us not take our time, missing some great opportunities along the way. Soften hearts that need to be softened. Build self-confidence where it needs to be built and be the leading conversationalist. Thank you, Lord. For this new chapter. For Your love. For the support system around me. For the growth that has happened through this support system around me, and the ability now to have it grow through me and into other's lives.

I am amazed...

... at the level of intellectual hipocracy (spelling?) that some people have. I sat and listened to someone manipulate an uninformed audience to turn a discussion in a direction that sent many mixed signals to a specific individual and provided a chance for others to "jump aboard." I could not believe it. I am still awed. This person is literally saying two different things. He is just being so clever with how and when he words them, that those not knowing details don't have a clue. The sad truth is, is that the details of the situation can not be shared. The topic at hand needed to be thought about without influence of personalization. The only problem was that it is impossible to separate personal from professional.

Okay, I've said enough. And maybe I shouldn't have said this much... Lord, help me love him as you love him. Give me knowledge and wisdom that will better this situation and provide the words that need to be said if I am ever presented or pressured with a situation. Continue to go before me and help me see, recognize and praise You for all that You have done, are doing, and will do.

Oh, My lanta...

... so I'm coaching a basketball team. 7 1st and 2nd grade girls. They are so much fun! We had our first practice tonight. I have a lot to learn!!!

Okay, okay... quit laughing. I know I've never played for a team, but hey... we can all learn together. The guy in charged asked if I knew what they shot at, what they shot and what it was called when they bounced it. I answered all of them correctly and they said I was over qualified! :) Go figure... anywayz, it will be fun nonetheless.

Well, I'm off to de-clutter my house some more. I've entered this new stage of life of neading everything to have it's own place... and for it to stay there. I know that I am going to enjoy this new level of cleanliness, but it is driving me nuts trying to get there. Part of me just wants to move into a new house so that I can put everything away and let it be... but that's going a little overboard. Anywayz, I'm off.

I'm in the middle of having an allergy attack, along with getting a cold, and I'm not having fun. I've sneezed to many times to count today and my right eye is swollen. I hope it doesn't last long. I did get some allergy medicine in me a few min. ago. I hope it helps! I also hope this is gone by morning. I have to sing... and it won't be pretty if I'm still in this condition!

The last few days have been very uplifting. I am coordinating a benefit dinner and I am overwhelmed by the amount of help that is being offered. I actually have more volunteers than jobs! God's help in all of this has been so encouraging. I have had to do very little. Things are just laid before me. I know that God is going to provide greatly through this event. I can't wait to see it all happen.

I confess...

... I forgot to lean on God and His strength today.

I wonder...

… how do they get the ‘m’s on the m&m candies? I was eating some very yummy m&ms today and started thinking about this question. I came up with some answers, but it would be interesting to know the true answer.
I know, I know… I’m crazy, but you gotta love me! J

The last few days have been filled with blessings, pain and joy. My mother made a comment about when you are involved in a larger community like the school or church, you experience more pain. That is so true, but at the same time, you get to experience more joy as well. Praise God that He is bigger than everything and can overcome anything. Praise God that He allows us, and desires us to develop these relationships and experiences. It amazes me to think of the depths of the relationships. I am very blessed. I could never have dreamt about a support system this strong. When one gets stronger, we all get stronger. When one becomes weak, we come together to support them and help build them up. Thank you, Lord.

Tonight at Bible study, there were some things that came up that I don't really agree with. I'm still wrestling with the ideas, but nonetheless, they are not sitting with me well. We kinda talked about this mornings message, but also got off track. Towards the end, we were given quotes to read out loud. One of my quotes I had to read stated, "God isn't looking for people of great faith, but for individuals ready to follow Him." - Hudson Taylor What was the mind set behind this statement? I want to go into how I feel about this, but it is 12:30 am and I must go to bed. Besides, I'm not sure I'm ready to verbalize how I feel just yet. I'm still trying to wrap my mind around it.

God's perfect timing

I was reminded several times today about God's perfect timing. I needed it. I forget sometimes that He is God and that my schedule isn't the best. :) I left work late and decided that I didn't want to think about dinner. So... I choose to go to Panera. I was ordering and after I gave my name I heard "Erica Ropp." It was so weird. She said it in a tone that was as if she hadn't seen me in 10 years, but really it was my roomie! :) She was downtown shopping and decided to eat at Panera too. How fun it was to spend dinner with her.

There were other little things that reminded me of His timing today, as well. Like timing of phone calls and fun little notes. I was very blessed today.

Part of me feels guilty. God has been so good to me lately, and I have had one of the worst attitudes at work. I was at work for a half hour today and had to go find a spot to sit quietly and get focused on God again because I was spiraling downhill fast. It doesn't help that the first thing I got to handle this morning was the security system and the new alarm that no one had a code to in order to shut it off. I'll tell you one thing, if someone does break in, the sound of that alarm will send them right back out of the building. It is horrendous!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And it echos so beautifully down that hallway and in the parent foyer...

So anywayz, be praying that I can have a positive attitude and not let the devil get a hold in the school. I need to be steady, stable and strong... being frustrated or having a poor attitude will dilute that without a problem.

Well, I'm off. Good night, sleep well.

Bundle of joy...

I got to hold one of the cutest little babies today. :) Her name is Franchesca Sara Meek. (spelling?) 21 inches and 7 lb. 13 oz. of complete cuteness. Dad and mom are doing great. Although, mom can't walk very well. But then again, it's only been 15 hours since she gave birth.


The building is closer everyday to being finished. We got floor pockets today and all of the security "stuff" will be finished tomorrow. I can't wait for that to be done! I know more now than when I started this project. I just wish I knew then what I know now... it would have helped a lot! There is to much to think about!


Well, I'm off to clean. The kitchen needs some serious help. Have a great day!

Have you ever had a moment when you look back on it and wonder what you were thinking? Well, I had one this morning. I threw a minor fit over something and the person that got to experience it just laughed... which was the appropriate thing to do because I had to have sounded and looked rediculous! :) Oddly enough, however, I feel better. I'm not so frustrated. Still frustrated, just not as much. Am I aloud to be frustrated? I've been honest about it with God. I do have a deeper sense of peace even though on the surface it is a source of stress. Well, maybe not so much stress... I don't know the right word for it.


Well, if you know the answer to if I'm suppose to be frustrated... please answer. I honestly do not know if it is biblical to have this lingering over me.

Other than that, life is great! Things are going well and I'm working towards a greater balance in my life. There is a lot to juggle!